Heres a little poem/song I wrote at the beginning of the year, and I just want to get some feedback on it. Its called The Stained Emerald, and its about the troubles in the north of Ireland.
A young girl walks all alone
Down a street, now a warzone
Her long black hair covers her face
Her school uniform remains in place
In her hand she holds a cross
The cause behind, what is this loss
Hiding nothing, she opens her eyes
Icy blue, they tell no lies
A cool wind blows, though only weak
She opens her mouth and begins to speak
Who am I to survive
Thousands dead, yet I'm alive
The emerald has been forever stained
The blood of many, that has been drained
The whistles play, with the voilins strings
Guns run rampid, while the church choir sings
By now her eyes have lost all life
Cold to the pain, sorrow and strife
Her pale skin shivers in the wind
A holy war, tainted by sin
She walks to the church, her body so weak
She opens her mouth and begins to speak
Who am I to survive
Thousands dead, yet I'm alive
The emerald has been forever stained
The blood of many, that has been drained
The whistles play, with the voilins strings
Guns run rampid, while the church choir sings
North, South, East and West
All assume to be the best
I am right, you are wrong
This is how, history has gone
A woman walks all alone
Down what was a warzone
Her long black hair covers her face
Her black trenchcoat remains in place
In her hand now joins another
A child, now she is a mother
hiding nothing she opens her eyes
Icy blue, they tell no lies
A cool wind blows, though only weak
She opens her mouth and begins to speak
I am one to survive
Thousands dead, yet I'm alive
The emerald has been forever stained
The blood of many, that has been drained
The whistles play, with the voilins strings
Theres silence now, while the church choir sings
漏 Se谩n Moloney 2009Can you give me your opinions.?
that's rely wow i write poetry to im no-were near as good as youCan you give me your opinions.?
i think that is amazing i don't know why made me decide t read i don't usually read things like this but im happy i did. keep it up
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