Life ruined my fault?

Seven years ago start taking drug finasteride aka propecia for hair loss.


Forgot about side effects and had libido problems while on the drug without knowing why.


Last year move into flatshar to save money for a house - since this recession was supposed to be worst ever and buying was mad we were told.


Flat'mate' turns out to have aspergers - didn't mention this in the ad - and hardly talks, leaves lights out, puts his clothes in my wash, turns off the heating so I'm freezing...


Have panic attack at work mid last year, thought it was because of work harassment but instead was side effect of hormone drug propecia.


Then go back on drug and **** shrinks, finally figure out the cause then stop taking drug.


A week later aspie boy has slashed my leather jacket the horrible bastard cos I looked at him funny.


He couldn't get into nightclubs so was jealous. Plus he was a middle class **** while I come from poor stock.





No living room just a small cold room with crap tv so just stay in my room after work, no TV, and masturbate to internet porn all night, reducing testosterone levels more.


Tried to move out of flat but landlord tells me I have to sign new lease and stay or else move out next day, going back on his word.





Three weeks after quitting propecia my dick and balls shrink and I'm impotent for life, lose muscle, good looks and job.


Will be on testosterone replacemnet therapy for life which might not even work.


Also should add my old flatmate before the aspie knew I was taking the pills and also Viagra - cos I didn't know why i had no libido- and told my friends behind my back I used viagra but not propecia.





Should I be mad at all these characters?





Is it my fault, theirs, a bit of both or what? Should I get revenge?





Where does blame lie:


1)me for buying drug


2)aspie for lying about the flat then trying and succeeding to make my life a misery and thus making susceptibilty to drug sides worse, rendering me impotent for life?


3)Landlord for not watching the flat, allowing it to be grotty and unclean,not vetting flatmates and crucially not letting me move out and being threatening in doing so


4)Previous flatmate who knew I took propecia and had sides but didn't warn me and told friends about viagra, plus left the flat leaving me to have to find a new one


5)Previous workmate who tried to make my life a misery but harassing me and making insinuations about my background, sexuality etc


6)the drug company Merck


7)the spivs who sold me it online without warning





THANKS FOR READING PLEASE GIVE ME YOUR THOUGHTSLife ruined my fault?
Try Byron Katie's worksheets.





Love and best wishes.





xxxLife ruined my fault?
If you have taken drugs that have not been prescribed by your doctor then you only have yourself to blame. I know it sounds harsh but it's true. Yes, it sounds like you have some crap in your life but when you behave like a victim, people treat you like a victim. You need to stop trying to blame everyone else and everything else and take responsibility for your life. Your landlord cannot do this to you if you have signed a contract. He thinks he can scare you and you are letting him. Go and see Citizen's Advice.





Good luck with your life - just make it your life.